Category Archives: Mom Articles

The Rainbow that Followed a Life Storm

Posted on by
6

My seven-year-old daughter is terrified of thunderstorms. Every night when I’m tucking my sweet Ella into bed, she will say, “Please watch the weatherman and come get me if it is windy, rainy or thundery.” 

One day as we were walking into swim practice on a clear, picture-perfect day, I said, “I’m so thankful for the beautiful weather and sunshine.” 

She agreed and added, “I like the storms too, Mom.”

“Then maybe you could sleep in your own bed when it storms!” I laughed. 

 “I like the storms because afterwards God makes a beautiful rainbow,” she said, “and everything starts to grow again.” 

I was shocked at her wisdom. Most of all, I was a very proud mom because I knew she was learning an important life lesson.

Storms are a part of life. They unexpectedly blow into our lives and leave us tattered and torn. When they finally end, we must pick up the pieces and rebuild. Being a Christian isn’t a promise from God that nothing bad will ever happen; however, being a Christian is what helps us rebuild after we have experienced our own personal storms. 

When my daughter was three, I became pregnant with our second child. My husband and I went to our first prenatal appointment with much excitement and a list of questions ranging from prenatal vitamins to when I could fly during my pregnancy. It’s amazing how you forget this stuff from the first time! 

During the ultrasound, a perplexed look came across my doctor’s face. After what seemed like an eternity, she told me I had a “missed miscarriage”. My heart sank. I couldn’t talk or cry. I was numb. 

My body never recognized the miscarriage. Two weeks later, I had to undergo a D&C on our seventh wedding anniversary. I didn’t think it was fair. We have a loving, Christian home. We’re good people. Why? I felt empty and desolate. The sadness hurt. I wondered if anything would ever be the same again. 

It wasn’t easy, but we rebuilt after our storm by praying, thanking God for our many blessings, and seeking the support of family and friends. I was reminded that my life experiences, including the destructive storms, determine who I am. The rebuilding process required strength and patience, but a rainbow did follow. We were blessed with our son. 

Our storms give each of us a unique story. I pray that when you find yourself in the midst of a storm, you will remember that a rainbow follows. After the rainbow, everything grows.

“Consider it pure joy…whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” James 1:2-4

Without the miscarriage (a horrible life storm), we wouldn't have our sweet son (the rainbow).

The Conversation:  Think of one of your life’s storms. After you gave yourself time to grieve and/or heal (which could take months or years, depending on the storm), did a rainbow follow? Please share your stories!

Life is short. Cherish each moment!

Posted on by
9

Many years ago, we unexpectedly lost a loved one. We were playing putt-putt golf, on the 18th hole and she was winning. We were laughing, happy and carefree. Then, a second later … she had a stroke. It was devastating and life-changing. No warning, just gone. She was happily married and had two young, precious children. I watched their grief and was helpless.

Her death changed how I live. I had experienced other losses, but this was different because death came so suddenly – it taught me the value of each second. 

Then, I became a mom. This experience began to haunt me and fear set into my life. I wasn’t afraid of death for me, but I was fearful that my children would grow up without a mom. I was anxious. I prayed for help. It didn’t happen automatically, but looking back … God brought people into my life and gave me the tools I needed to help with this anxiety.

Here are just a few things that have helped me:

  • I started a family tradition. Each year on my child’s birthday, I write them a letter. I try to capture the time frozen in that moment – how I feel about them, things they’ve done to make me laugh or cry happy tears, their personality traits, favorite toys, etc. They will always have those letters from Mom, no matter what happens to me.
  • I realized that death is a part of life. I have no control over when I die so I will stop wasting today.
  • I cherish every day, every second. Life is short.
  • The most helpful of all – I read the following Scriptures. I memorized the words, stamped them on my heart. And little by little, when the fear would creep in, my mind would automatically remember these truths.

            “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Philippians 4:6 — Don’t worry, be prayerful!

             “Worry weighs a person down; an encouraging word cheers a person up.” Proverbs 12:25

             “Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?” Matthew 6:27

Although her sudden death changed my life, so did her life legacy. She was my step-mom. She truly lived, she spent more time investing in her children than having an immaculate house. Before I had children, I secretly judged her “messiness”. Now, I get it. I’m enjoying my own mess! 

{Letters to my children}

{Philippians 4 Cross - A gift from my amazing mentor}

The Conversation:

What helps you value each day instead of worrying about the future? Please share your stories and ideas!

Help, I need a new attitude!

Posted on by
13

Several years ago, I sat in a Mothers of Preschoolers[1] meeting and the guest speaker asked us to write down our favorite childhood memory. My mind flooded with silent giggles as I recalled mixing water and dirt, then filling the aluminum pans. I would create a make-believe oven from bricks and bake the brown, gooey pie. Finally, the most exciting part of all … when the mud-pies were finished “baking”, I would throw them at the largest oak tree in my grandma’s backyard. This simple activity has become etched in my mind as my all-time favorite childhood memory.

The speaker challenged us to put that piece of paper in a visible location as a reminder each day about taking time to enjoy those small precious moments with our children. So, I put the small leaf-sized paper on my fridge and saw it every day. It helped and I remembered the lesson. 

Years after hearing that speaker, I was having one of those extra-chaotic days. The to-do list was overwhelming – there wasn’t a clean towel in the house, lots of unanswered emails in my in-box, bills to pay, preschool class party to plan – my plate was full. I was overwhelmed, grouchy and found myself lacking patience. That was it, I give up! I slammed the fridge shut and then I saw the leaf with the life lesson.

My children and I went to our backyard, and we all laughed as we made mud-pies. We used the back of my son’s monster truck as our oven and then we threw our messy creations at the fence! We giggled … we had fun … we made memories! Their enthusiasm and energy were contagious, and I gladly soaked up every ounce. I relished in their smiles and the muddy handprints on my clothes. I became appreciative again. 

After our adventure, I had a whole new perspective and was blessed with the attitude adjustment I needed. After that boost, I knocked out the to-do list and finished the laundry – I was on a roll. Then, I sat down with my daughter to help her write in her take-home journal about her favorite weekend activity. It had been very busy – a few hours at Six Flags, seeing friends at church, a good friend’s birthday party, those were my suggestions. She sweetly said, “Mom, the most fun I had this weekend was making mud-pies with you.” 

Life is busy. Motherhood is crazy and unscripted. No matter what is going on, take a moment and simply enjoy your children. Laugh and have fun. Record the memories on your heart. Your children will treasure it, and you will gain a fresh, new perspective.

{Leaf with the Life Lesson}

{Daughter's Journal Entry}

 

The Conversation Question:

When you are feeling overwhelmed or stressed, what helps give you a fresh new perspective?  Please share your story and ideas!

[1] MOPS is an international organization for mothers who have children ranging in ages from birth – kindergarten.  If you are interested in finding a MOPS group in your area, please go to www.mops.org.